The most widely applicable cliche is "We all make mistakes", "To err is human", "Experience is a sum total of mistakes" etc. etc. And it is a fact that we all really do make mistakes.
Some mistakes are made under cover, i.e. in school or college or in training periods, where the fall out is usually not that direct on the individual. Some mistakes can be fatal, not only to oneself only.
'Drunk' policewoman crashes car, kills four Indians
Mon-Mar 23, 2009
New York / Press Trust of India
Four Indian IT students, including three girls, were killed and another was injured when an off-duty and apparently drunk policewoman crashed her car into their vehicle on a highway in the US State of Missouri.
Some mistakes never see the light of day.This applies specially to policemen, army personnel, gangsters and doctors--in fact all those who have partially or totally, a "Sanction to kill". These people live with their mistakes for their whole life. They thrust these incidents to the darkest corner of their souls, but they surface when they face themselves on some stormy nights, when the soul in a self cleansing act bares itself .
However the crucial issue is how you face mistakes. There are several types of reactions.
One is hiding the mistake, and hoping no one gets to seeing it.This occurs in daily life and one can get away with that most of the time. However, if this occurs in the workplace, you can rest assured that your "friends" will make it public and get the most out of it. Sometimes you do not even know that you have made the mistake, until it suddenly blows up in your face unexpectedly. In these cases it is important to reexamine the mistake and find out why it happened. Mistakes are the best way to learn--though it involves a lot of loss of face and prestige ,where years of diligent work can be wiped out instantly---as society sometimes judges you by your mistakes and rarely by achievement.
Sometimes your mistake can be the work of intelligent framers. They will change their lines, modify the circumstances and hope that you are put into discomfiture so that they can get some benefits. So reexamining your mistakes are important. Find out whether you are REALLY responsible or not. And if you are not guilty, mark your enemy conspirators.
It is always best to admit your mistake and try and rectify it. Damages done cannot be easily undone. However time, your past and future sincerity will ultimately win the day. If remedial measures are possible, then the extra burden and time have to be fitted in and done.
It is best not to blame anyone else for your mistake. Though it is tempting to do so. If you have not been the victim of a conspiracy, and that is rare, then the acknowledgement of a mistake can help things move forward. However, if you have muffed the catch that cost you the World Cup, like Herschell Gibbs of South Africa did when he dropped Steve Waugh, you will never be able to rectify that. Perhaps Gibbs's alcoholism has its roots in that incident.
Finally ,never berate yourself, specially in public. There is a big difference between admitting your mistake and crucifying yourself again and again. More care, more concentration in work will help. But your past record cannot and never will be forgotten by a minor, doubtful allegation.
There are as many reasons for making a mistake. Sometimes, it is because of carelessness, sometimes because of misinterpretation, sometimes out of hurriedness, sometimes out of not thinking it through properly. The reasons vary but when you do make that mistake, and you know that you should have known better, it can feel very depressing. But rest assured that you are not alone. In fact if you have never made a major mistake, you can be quite certain that one day you will.
This situation is probably the most challenging one in which to engage in positive realistic thinking. However this is the time when it is critical that you control your thoughts. Be realistic about just how terrible the mistake really is. Chances are that no one has died as a result of your mistake.We have a tendency to label situations a disaster. But consider how disastrous the situation really truthfully is. It is probably embarrassing. Some of your peers or colleagues might lose some respect for you. You might even be ashamed. These are all unpleasant but not fatal. And in fact, they are all recoverable. You will get over your embarrassment. As long as you act with dignity and are sure to perform respectably in the future, you will earn again the respect of your colleagues and peers. And you behavior now will help you to re-establish your self-respect.
Many mistakes are like a storm in a teacup.
These are 3 ways to rally yourself around.
Refocus and stay busy
A useful method to keep yourself from obsession is to stay busy being productive on other projects. Now is a good time to spring clean or exercise or finally start writing that novel. Keep your mind actively engaged on other productive activities. A by-product of this is that you feel proud that you have accomplished things even during this difficult time, which will act as a positive counterpoint for any self-deprecating thoughts.
Don’t define yourself by this one mistake
The fact that you made a mistake does not negate all the accomplishments and successes you have achieved. Under no circumstances must you use negative vocabulary. Be very careful not to identify yourself with the incident. Instead of saying “I am a loser”, say “I am a usually capable person who made a mistake but is doing what is necessary to rectify it and use it as an opportunity to learn and grow.” And actively bring to mind all of your past accomplishments and success. Dwell on them. Remind yourself that you are also a successful productive person.
This too shall pass
Remind yourself that while this is a difficult time in your life, it shall pass. A year from now things will be much improved because you are taking steps to ensure that they will. Remind yourself that you want to look back on this challenging time and be proud of how you handled the situation.
Only those who are asleep make no mistakes.
Ingvar Kamprad
Listen to these two contrasting songs--Gary Allan and Nusrat Fatah Ali Khan...
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